This year will be difficult. Your first encounter with loss and grief. You will not have the power to change what happens around you, to your family, but nothing will be your fault. And while you are right that life will never be the same...you will also be okay.
Dear 13 Year Old Mandy...
Spend more time with your sister than you do your friends. She looks up to you, loves you and wants your time...one day she will live hours away and be so busy with her own life she won't have time to sit in the bathroom and talk to you while you get ready. Let her borrow your clothes, she will take them anyway and give them away so she doesn't get caught...if you let her wear them you might get them back.
Dear 15 Year Old Mandy...
Don't kiss the OTHER boy, it isn't worth it. You will lose someone you will spend years trying to win back...your impulsive decision will result in many tears and missed opportunities. Though you will marry the boy whose heart you broke...there will be tremendous heartbreak in the process of winning him back. He is the one...he really is.
Dear 18 Year Old Mandy...
If you listen to the letter prior...18 will be much easier. Don't come home from Truman State University (NMSU), leaving Lindsay and your DZ sisters...stay and enjoy college knowing Keegan is NOT dating someone else...EAT for goodness sakes rather than worrying your parents...And stop playing immature GIRL games...he loves you...you will see.
Dear 22 Year Old Mandy...
It may seem like everyone else is doing it and you are the last unmarried girl in your High School class, but wait for the right one. Don't hurt someone that should have stayed your good friend and don't let him spend years hurting you. Don't get married for the sake of getting married...save shopping with your mom and sister for your wedding dress, picking the song to dance with your Dad, and promises of forever when there isn't a doubt in your mind...when part of you doesn't want him to open the door to the church and stop it all. You aren't ready.
Dear 29 Year Old Mandy...
If you have ignored everything else, please listen to this...let him leave...when he threatens you...let him walk out the door...grieve and move on...you are strong enough though you won't think you are. Don't get on your hands and knees begging...LET HIM GO. Spend as much time as you can with your Grandpa...you will lose him this year. Fortunately you are very close and have always spent a lot of time together...come home when your mom calls on the night he dies though...you will want to be there.
Dear 30 Year Old Mandy...
You handle it all wrong, beating yourself up to a point that you are not able to enjoy the way life will unfold...you will finally become his wife...you will be blessed by a perfect baby boy...your friends will turn on you...say cruel, heartbreaking things...and as he moves mountains to be with you, does everything in his power to make you happy...you will take it all for granted, stressing him out...unable to enjoy that your heart is finally home. Eventually you figure it all out and allow yourself to be happy...not before unnecessary arguing and turmoil.
Dear 34 Year Old Mandy...
Don't regret your mistakes. Embrace the lessons you've learned along the way...lessons that gave you the ability to appreciate what you have...an amazing and handsome husband and two gorgeous little boys...All that happened in the past is the past and has played whatever role needed to bring you to today...don't dwell...just be...knowing it has all been worth it.
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